And Again with the Zombies…

OK – that’s what you’re probably going to think when you read this post.  But I’m sorry.  Zombies are really hot right now.  They are everywhere.  Video games, movies, TV shows, CDC websites, books, everywhere. So I can’t avoid writing about my not-so-secret obsession about them and thinking about how I could perhaps make some major money off this thing.

I consider myself to be a fairly fashionable person.  True, like everyone else I have some fashion skeletons in my closet (don’t act like you weren’t totally into those MC Hammer pants, too), but overall I feel that I dress pretty well.  Which got me to thinking when the zombie apocalypse happens, women are totally going to need the right clothing!  You can’t run from zombies in 5 inch heels.  But I’m sure women such as myself would still like to wear fashionable shoes – so a line of comfortable, yet fashionable, zombie-ass-kicking boots is a necessity.  And you’re going to need a cool vest or jacket to sheathe your machete in, which comes with hidden pockets for grenades and ammo for your sawed-off shotgun…  Just because the world is coming to an end, that’s no reason to not be fashionable, people.

Then we come to vehicles.  The hubs and I were discussing this last night.  We live in Texas, so like every other self-respecting Texan we drive large vehicles – SUV mom-mobile for me (equipped with a grill guard), and truck for him.  In any zombie invasion having the proper escape vehicle is key.  And let’s face it – a Prius isn’t going to cut it. (No offense to anyone who drives a Prius, you’re already doing your part to ensure that the zombie apocalypse doesn’t begin courtesy of environmental disaster.)  In this case, bigger truly is better.  And, what would be better than coming out with an entire line of truck and SUV accessories like a grill guard and windshield cage equipped with spikes, blades, and other accoutrement designed to maim, dismember, and mow down those zombie assholes??

So, those are just a few of my ideas.  Just know I’ve got some patents pending so don’t try to steal ‘em…

Ready to survive the zombie invasion,

Shan

Lastly, I did owe a correction to my previous post about fast zombies.  Apparently it is possible to place a sail on a battleship, as I was informed by a friend of my husband, that in the Pyramid of Darkness series on GI Joe they did just that.  I still have my doubts about the ability to quickly manufacture a sail of the magnitude that a battleship would need, but if GI Joe did it, then it can be done.  I stand corrected.  Whatever.

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “And Again with the Zombies…

  1. No one would put a sail on a battleship. That’s stupid. Whoever gave you that feedback is dumb, really, really dumb, for real. That’s like putting a spoiler on a Range Rover…bad idea.

  2. Ok, well I was wondering what I was going to get you for Christmas but now I know.

    http://www.opticsplanet.com/zero-zombie-kit.html

    Have you ever seen Sean of the Dead? You probably wouldn’t appreciate the humor because those zombies would freak you out but, it’s really good. I would be the one that would just hole up at a bar and get drunk. But, if you would loan me one of your weapons I’d be down to take a few of them out first.

    • And speaking of Xmas, yes, I would love that gift. It is the perfect gift for me. But if you’re ballin’ enough to buy me that, then I might have some other things to add to the list!

      And yup, I think we might even own that movie. It’s pretty funny, and I actually brought it up the other night when Robert suggested he would hole up in the tower of America, which is basically the same thing as a bar, just like 300 feet up in the air. But yes, those zombies do freak me out as well…

  3. Pingback: WILOW – Hiding My Funny « This is Shan's Blog

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s